“Those Whom God Has Joined Together”

This Sunday’s Gospel reading from Mark 10:2-16 has one of the most difficult passages and one of the most beautiful. It includes Jesus’ inflexible teaching on marriage and divorce (remarriage is adultery) and at the same time, “let the little children come to me.” Context matters, of course. Marriage in the first century isn’t the same as today; back then they were probably arranged, and the ones who were most powerless in a divorce were women and children. Jesus quotes Genesis 1 & 2 (Mark 10:6-8), texts that describe male/female relations as normative, particularly for procreation. (Which is why I think the text on welcoming children immediately follows.) This text has also been used as an argument against same-sex marriage. But there’s a difference between something being normative and something being exclusive. Despite his very clear teaching on divorce, over 40% of first marriages end in divorce. However, just because divorce is not God’s intent, under no circumstances does that mean someone should stay in an abusive relationship. What is God’s good intent, and what do God-given relationships look like today?

      “Those whom God has joined together, let no one separate” (Mark 10:9). This verse from the Gospel is used at every wedding. It’s my favorite line in the service. Do I believe that God joined together the lesbian couple in one of my congregations who had been together for 25+ years and worshiped every Sunday? Yes! Did God join together one of my best friends and his ex-wife? Yes, even though they divorced after 14 years of marriage. I officiated at their wedding. Is God’s intent to bless us with companionship? Yes! God’s good intent for us is to have life-giving, intimate, committed relationships. Do I believe God has joined together every couple that gets married? No. Jesus did say, “A tree will be borne out by its fruits” (Luke 6:43-44). And sometimes for a whole host of reasons relationships need to end.

      Just like the fact we have to discern God’s voice to us in scripture in order to learn God’s good intent for us, I think we have to be clear-eyed and discerning in our relationships just as well. In order to remember, to celebrate, give thanks for, acknowledge, and bless those relationships! Because God’s intent is to bless us!

Peace,

Pr. Christian